Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
JULY 29, 2009
FreeWillAstrology.com
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"The central feature of the human situation is the existence
of the unconscious, the existence of a reality of which we are
unconscious. In Freud's words, 'The unconscious is the true psychic
reality; in its inner nature it is just as much unknown to us
as the reality of the external world, and it is just as imperfectly
communicated to us by the data of consciousness as is the external
world by the reports of our sense-organs."
- N. O. Brown
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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:
GATHERING PLACE FOR PRONOIAC DATA
Beauty and Truth Lab researcher Darin Wilson has created a website
that archives all the pronoia resources I identify here.
pronoiaresources.com
BENEVOLENT PRANKS
Clowns Trick the KKK
tinyurl.com/26q7x5
MAKING ORDINARY THINGS SING AND DANCE
Creative use of shopping carts
tinyurl.com/knslnu
PRONOIA WORSHIPS THE MYSTERIES
13 things that don't make sense
tinyurl.com/clfvzk
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning July 30
Copyright 2009 by Rob Brezsny
FreeWillAstrology.com
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):
Would you like to spend the next 30 years working your assets
off to make your bosses rich? If not, I suggest you start formulating
Plan B immediately. The astrological time is not exactly ripe
to extricate yourself from the wicked game, but it's ripe to begin
scheming and dreaming about how to extricate yourself. Here's
a tip to get you in the mood. Assume that there's some validity
in the meme that mythologist Joseph Campbell articulated: "Follow
your bliss and the money will come." Then ask yourself, "Do
I even know what my bliss is? Not my mild joy or diversionary
fun but my unadulterated bliss?" Once you know that, you
can follow it. And then, inevitably -- although it may take a
while -- the money will follow.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
As the season of riddles and paradoxes kicks into high gear,
I present you with a two-part quiz. Question 1: Since it has taken
you your whole life to become the person you are today, is it
reasonable to expect that you can transform yourself in a flash?
Question 2: On the other hand, since you are more creative than
you give yourself credit for, and are also in an astrological
phase when your ability to change is greater than usual, is it
reasonable to assume that you must remain utterly stuck in your
old ways of doing things?
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
So much to say and do. So little time. Is it OK if I pepper you
with pithy hints? It's the only way to fit everything in. Here
goes. There's strength in numbers, Libra. So travel in packs.
Round up support and whip up group fervor. Always say "we,"
not "I." Add at least one new friend and bolster at
least one old friendship. Think before you act, but always act
instead of watching from afar. Avoid doing stupid things in smart
ways. To court good luck, do charity work. To ensure that extra
favors will come your way later this year, do extra favors now.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
The Biblical book of Isaiah prophesies a future time of undreamed-of
harmony and cooperation. "The wolf will romp with the lamb,"
reads one translation. "Cow and bear will graze in the same
pasture, their calves and cubs will grow up together, and the
lion will eat straw like the ox." I have it on good astrological
authority that you're now eligible for a mini-preview of this
paradisiacal state. To receive your free introductory offer, you
need only meet one condition. You must vow not to harm any living
thing -- not even a cockroach. Not even the person you love best.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
You Sagittarians are famous for filling your cups too full.
Sometimes this is cute. Sometimes it's a problem for those who
don't like Cabernet Sauvignon sloshed on their handwoven Persian
rugs. This week, however, I predict there will be little or no
hell to pay for overflowing. So go ahead and transcend your containers,
you beautiful exaggerators. Feel free to express yourself like
a fire hose. Now enjoy a few gems from your fellow Sagittarius,
the extravagant poet and painter William Blake. 1. "The road
of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." 2. "Exuberance
is beauty." 3. "The lust of the goat is the bounty of
God." 4. "You never know what is enough unless you know
what is more than enough."
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
Constant vigilance, my friend. That's what I advise. Be attentive
to details you sometimes gloss over. Wake up a little earlier
and prepare for each encounter with greater forethought. Stare
a little harder into the hearts of all those whose hidden motivations
might detour your destiny. Monitor all communications for hints
that all is not as it seems. Most importantly, guard against the
possibility that you may be overlooking a gift or blessing that's
being offered to you in an indirect way.
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LISTEN TO AN EXPANDED HOROSCOPE
Besides all the free stuff, I also offer in-depth audio horoscopes
that cost a little money. Find out more at RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888
or 1-900-950-7700.
"The best part about your audio horoscopes is that they
pat me on the head and kick me in the ass at the same time."
- Rita L., San Diego
"Your audio oracles go beyond helping me find the truth
-- they inspire me to find the WILD truth."
- Patrick K., Montreal
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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
"Keep exploring what it takes to be the opposite of who
you are," suggests psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi,
author of the book Creativity: Flow and the Psychology of
Discovery and Invention. This advice is one of his ideas
about how to get into attunement with the Tao, also known as being
in the zone or getting in the groove or being aligned with the
great cosmic flow. How would you go about being the opposite of
who you are, Aquarius? According to my reading of the omens, that
will be an excellent question for you to muse about in the coming
weeks. As you stretch yourself to embody the secret and previously
unknown parts of you, I think you'll be pleased with how much
more thoroughly that allows you to be in sync with the rhythms
of life.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):
Internet addiction has risen to epidemic proportions in China.
In early 2009, psychologists in Shandong province began offering
an alleged cure that involved the use of electro-shock therapy.
Parents of 3,000 young people paid Dr. Yang Yongxin and his team
over $800 a month to hook their anesthetized teens up to machines
that sent electricity through their brains to induce artificial
seizures. After four months, the Chinese government intervened
and halted the treatment, noting that there was no evidence it
worked. This practice might sound comically barbaric to you, but
I think it has a certain resemblance to the way you have been
dealing with your own flaws and excesses: with inordinate force.
In the coming weeks, I really think it's important not to punish
yourself for any reason, Pisces, even if it's in a supposedly
good cause. The lesson of the Chinese experiment is: not only
is it overkill, it also doesn't even have the desired effect.
ARIES (March 21-April 19):
Are you a gelatinous pool of longing yet? Are you a perfumed
garden of madly blooming purple explosions? Are you throbbing
and gooey and half-nauseous with that delicious sickness some
people called love? If not, I don't know what to tell you. By
all astrological reckoning your gut should be swarming with drunk
butterflies and the clouds should be taking on the shapes of mating
horses. If you're not half-drowning in these symptoms, I implore
you to find a way to pry open the floodgates.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20):
You're primed to cancel a jinx in the coming days, Taurus. You
could help someone (maybe even yourself) escape a bewitchment,
and you might be able to soothe a wound that has been festering
for a long time. In fact, I'm playing with the fantasy that you
are now the living embodiment of a lucky charm. At no other time
in recent memory have you had so much power to reverse the effects
of perverse karma, bad habits, and just plain negative vibes.
Your hands and eyes are charged with good medicine. Other parts
of you are, too, which means sexual healing could be in the works.
But as you embark on your mission to cure everyone you love, remember
the first law of the soul doctor: "Physician, heal thyself."
GEMINI (May 21-June 20):
The Norwegians used to have a concept
called svoermere, which meant something sweetly futile
or deliciously unprofitable. While I can see the appeal that your
particular version of svoermere has had for you, Gemini,
I think it's time to think about moving on. According to my reading
of the omens, you have both a right and a duty to seek out more
constructive pleasures that not only make you feel good but also
serve your long-term goals.
CANCER (June 21-July 22):
It's Freedom from Want Week! For Cancerians only! During this
uncanny grace period, you might actually feel perfectly contented.
It's quite possible that you'll be free from the obsession to
acquire more security, more love, more proof of your greatness,
more chotchkes, more everything. You may even make the shocking
discovery that you don't need nearly as much as you thought you
did in order to be happy; that maybe you have a lot to learn about
getting more out of what you already have.
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HOMEWORK:
Is there something about you that's too tame? If so, do you
think it's time to untame yourself? Go to FreeWillAstrology.com
and click on "Email Rob."
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2009 Rob Brezsny
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