| What in the world has happened to “E” in the English language? As school begins another round of learning, memorizing, and following the rules, I’m wondering why bother? Everything that I was told was essential to know during my student tenure between 1947 and 1961 isn’t! Most of the valuable information I absorbed before and after school, i.e., before kindergarten and after high school, has kept me alive and prospering. Other than the basic three R’s of reading, writing, and ‘rithmetic, knowledge of importance was acquired along life’s unpredictable pathway.
Today’s young women, unfortunately, are learning how to be ‘zillas, divas, and sizzling time bombs from the greatest teacher of all—television. Moms are allowing their daughters to be ‘educated’ by marketers, and they rush in tandem to the nearest department store mall for symbols of ‘belonging.’ Individual personalities are almost a treasure from the past (or Dark Ages as my era is currently considered!).
Four Letter Words
I began to get really concerned about five years ago—a wee bit late I’m afraid—while watching the weather channel transform its program style to compete with the then ‘Big Three.’ What caught my attention was the way females seemed to adopt strange pronunciation of simple, everyday, four letter words, such as west and best. West used to be pronounced with the ‘eh’ sound and best also. Now west is wast, and best is bast. Friend is now frand, and less is now lass. Did I miss an icon of stage and screen somewhere along the line? Who started this trand anyway?
To add dimension (dementia?) to the gigantic Tower of Babel we all must scale in order to be considered successful among today’s diverse populace, TV would have us believe that it helps if one is rude, loud, and otherwise annoyingly ‘expressive.’ Even on highly-rated talk shows, learned guests talk over each other, each trying to have the final and loudest memorable comment. What a pity, because neither males nor females get heard at all, and the featured topic is often lost or mercilessly mocked in false emphasis.
Turning Off Tantrums
Spelling is no longer a priority, communicating is a forgotten skill, and imparting wisdom is just wishful thinking unable to be spoken. Throw in a few tirades and temper tantrums, and—ho hum—I’d rather turn off the TV and read a good recipe book.
Books are not as they used to be either. They once were timeless, and coveted for their yellowed pages of information. Now, however, they come on silver discs or through the ethers to an electronic notebook that requires no fat-leaded (-‘ladded’ in moderneze) pencil. Big Chief tablets were once prized possessions of school kids entering a new academic year, but not any more. Today it’s Ebooks and text messages and on-the-spot photos, all spewing the only knowledge deemed worthy by the senders of being devoured.
Placating the goddesses of instant gratification has become most men’s ‘high maintenance’ challenges. The guys seem dumb-founded as to how this can be accomplished. A simple wildflower picked from a nearby field once did the trick, but with millions of product choices and even more opportunities for feminine tantrums these days, his alternative is often to give up in despair and rush to the nearest garage for some peace and quiet. But most females ambush their opposing males in public moments thinking this gives them an ‘entitled’ edge.
As e-motional bombs burst randomly at home, at work, and at play, the dudes run for any cover they can find. According to dating expert Christian Carter’s Ebook, How to Catch Him and Keep Him, Mr. Carter’s top admonition to women is to avoid emotional outbursts at all costs and at all times and in all venues. He states unequivocally and on behalf of all straight men that that’s the fastest way not to get a man (unless you’re Pamela Anderson, of course) or the fastest way to lose the one you want or already have.
Men display controlled emotion, such as anger, in an intentional manner to gain something, too. But men have been trained to pick the appropriate time and place, and have learned to allocate minimal energy for maximum effectiveness. Women, however, react to any given moment lest it go by, rather than awaiting perfect timing. The bigger her bang, the more shock value she derives—or so she thinks.
Whenever a woman is with a man and other people are around, he and most of the ‘others’ consider her a direct reflection on him and of his worth, stature, and manliness. (Sorry, ladies, but that’s the way it is.) Damsels today perceive such an audience as the perfect setting for her to demonstrate her ability to stand on her own two feet. Nothing could be further from the desired approval she’s seeking, and both he and she will suffer grave consequences from their peers as a result of her erroneous thinking.
Corporate Casualties
Having been in the corporate world for over twenty years, I watched women rise to glory and suddenly end up flat on their faces (or out the door). Employees, guests, girlfriends or wives—it mattered not a whit. Suddenly, she was shut out of the in crowd, and probably never knew why.
Modern E-motional time bombs can be likened to archaic mine fields, and sane men will not enter therein unless absolutely forced to do so. Then the field is level, and it’s every person for his or her self. Perhaps the old saying “all is fair in love and war” best depicts this idea and gives ample warning to those who engage therein. The illusive marketers, however, could care less if she gets trampled or he gets shredded right before the ‘others’ they’re both trying to impress.
Advice to young lassies from an un-credentialed but experienced teacher: read the moment thoroughly, write the silent script lovingly, and multiply the risk of speaking by the results desired before stomping your foot or opening your mouth to permanently insert it.
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